DEAR CAROLYN: I’ve been separated from my wife of 19 years and three kids for a few months. The separation stemmed from my infidelity, a mistake I made in an attempt to run from my marital problems instead of to communicate, try to work through them and take a stand for my happiness. It was cowardly and I regret it deeply.
We are in couple’s counseling and both want to find a way to reconcile, but we are struggling to get there. She can’t forgive me, and I am unable to convince her I am sorry enough without completely submitting and denying my authenticity.
I miss my kids terribly and this is hard on them. The truth is, though, that I want to reconcile only to unify the family. For all our sakes, personally and financially. Spending time alone with my wife is something I dread, as she is angry, judgmental, and constantly telling me all the things I’m doing wrong. When is it time to give up and move on?
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